The same old house, red and white. The same black gate. A white Proton Saga outside the porch. Same barking sound, only now the dogs were left free to greet us. Grandma’s bicycle, left untouch at the side of the gate. I stepped out of my car, went in the house. Same furniture. Same position. The chair that she always sit is still there. Plus one desk near the TV, with her photo on it, and a few burnt jossstick. Only now, I don’t need to look for grandma in the kitchen to tell her that we are here.
The disturbing thought that I dint manage to see grandma for one last time somehow replay in my mind. I choked back my grief, burnt a few joss stick and said silently “I am back to see you, grandma.” But I doubt she hears it anyway. Or maybe she did, like what mum said, she had turn into a moth and visited all her children elsewhere.
|(adopted from photo-dictionary.com)|
So we went to the hospital that she passed away. Aunt already made an appointment with the hospital regarding our complains on her death. I was the one who wrote the letter, so I had to be there, not knowing exactly what I had to say. Armed with the faith that I don’t think she deserve to go so soon, somehow I managed to voice out my confusion and understand that there was an error done by the nurse in the hospital. She was supposed to be on total bed rest, but instead, she died in the toilet. Angry at first, but I realised I might be the one doing the exact same mistakes that they did. The HO and MO, are so like what I am going to be in future. What more, the MO incharge was Dr Ng, who was about to cry in the meeting. Forgiven, but not forgotten.
May Po Po rest in peace. Chinese New Year will never be the same.